Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
