It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
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