good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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