I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
i out mim tonsoeep
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