no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
