so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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