I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
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