I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
