your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
