I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
