I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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