I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
