If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
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