I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
