It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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