im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Randomize
