All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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