no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Randomize
