Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
you mean i was at the winter classic?
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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