Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
only you would photoshop your dick
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Randomize
