On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
