i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
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