we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize
