im gay
i know
yea but for you.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
either way he was missing a nipple.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
