Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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