just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
When are your genitals available?
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
