I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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