It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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