Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
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