toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
