If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
