ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize