I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
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