ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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