Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
