All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Girls should come with a carfax report
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize