People in love make me want to vomit
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
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