I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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