Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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