I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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