I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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