was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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