Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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