David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
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