I accidentally burped into my bong.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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