Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
