I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
