triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
