It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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