Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
