just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
