I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
